In the loss of your husband, no one else can understand the grief in your heart. Only you knew this man entirely while the others knew him only in part. Irrespective of the situation of your husband’s demise, you will be surprised at the untimely and unsuitable remarks and queries. Although misfortune often brings out the best in people, it can also activate their nastiest side. As you grieve, know that you are still remembering and honouring the memory of your beloved husband, your dear confidant and your soul partner. He has left behind very kind and loving memories for you to remember. He will remain in your heart forever. Many people will send thoughts of sympathy and support to you as you begin your journey without your husband but no one else can lift away the anguish you are going through.
Just try to inculcate some of the points below as you gear up to face the world again.
1. Do not share your personal thoughts and feelings with any chat group. Very often people are curious to know what is happening in your life. Only a few of them would be genuinely concerned about your well being and will give you their frank opinion. Be careful while talking in groups. Don’t put your head blindly on anyone’s shoulder.
2. Your dignity and self-esteem is very important. Respect your own privacy. Expect weird questions from people. The easiest way to handle these questions is to simply ignore them or if someone is too inquisitive, just say that it is a personal matter.
3. Be cheerful. Laugh loudly. Keep your sense of humour alive and use it. Don’t get upset with people’s remarks, questions and suggestions.
As you are dealing with your own feelings, you certainly want to help your children to express their feelings and handle their own grief. Do not make any false stories about your husband, be it, his illness, his financial position, your bonding with him, and so on. Your children may ask you the same question repeatedly to see if the answer remains the same. Maybe they cannot understand how to deal with this tragedy. Sometimes they are given so much of information that it becomes very difficult for them to comprehend. Be diplomatic in your words. At times it will be very tempting to lie about your husband but be honest when you are talking to your children about their father.
No matter what the situation is, don’t stray too far from the truth.
Many a time we ask divine guidance to help and understand the reason for such a tragedy in our life, which has stretched our faith to such an extreme. But don’t lose hope;develop a deep and strong faith in the Almighty. As nations are built from ashes, just pray that you will rise above this situation. Your life partner’s sudden passing away has left a deep void in your life which nobody will be able to fill. Others cannot fathom the depth of your grief but in this period of immense trial, just seek the Grace of the Almighty to bless you and be with you in every step you take in life and to take care of you and your family. God Bless.
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